I am a dad of 3 little girls that span the ages of 2-4. I love them. They love me. They also love to test me and test my patience. When I can’t get work done, I can turn on the TV. When I can’t have a conversation with my wife, I can turn on one of our 3 iPads. That would be easy and solve 3 unhappy little personalities. Occasionally it happens. Instead I offer other options that can entertain my little ones that would be more productive. So I drag out puzzles, drawing options and other non-video games I think would be both fun and thought provoking for a 2 or 4 year-old. It is very energy and time consuming, but it’s hands-down better growth opportunities for our little ones (and us as parents that want to see our children improve) and sets them up for figuring out various future tests as they get older. It’s about teaching the tools needed to handle different situations.
Mindset. It’s a benign and innocuous term. It sounds easy when describing handling kids and steering them toward a more productive life. But it’s really a state of mind and a whole modus operandi in and around how to handle moments in life that aren’t familiar or patterned. It’s a simple idea that is very difficult to keep at the forefront of the mind. And it’s something that would enhance every adult and child’s life.
Mindset has been explored and thoroughly drawn out by the psychologist Carol Dweck in her book “Mindset” and “Mindset: Changing the Way you Think to Fulfill Your Potential”. It’s a theoretical approach to shifting the way we all think and how to better approach adversity and it can be applied to nearly all facets of life. Growth is best described as a pathway toward believing how your abilities can be harvested and improved upon vs. those who rely on knowledge and skills already acquired and/or inherent.
As a parent, I am always checking myself when I catch myself categorizing my children. It’s easy and comfortable to label them as good at something and not so good at something else. Instead, I try my best at thinking they are not fixed and stationary in their personalities, proclivities and talents. It’s hard—especially when my children are young and I’m trying to enrich their experiences with balances of tasks both tedious and complex with those that are routine in which they can excel at and build confidence. I also have to balance my tendency to steer them toward what I think is beneficial vs. what they discover on their own (discounting time spent watching cartoons on the iPad, of course). It’s particularly more challenging when the threshold for their explorations borders on physical injury risks.
The beauty about watching children respond and learn is that it’s simplistic in its approach. How can this be of any help? As an adult in the professional world, it’s primarily manifesting modesty and a willingness to say that I do not know something. It’s an eagerness to take continuing classes and finding new research and techniques. It could mean eschewing old ideas that are obsolete. It’s being able to say “I don’t know” and then finding the answers at a later date. It’s saying “I’m wrong” when I was wrong or when the approach I used to do does not work any longer. It is simple, but not easy to do.
As a strength and conditioning coach, it’s incumbent upon me to be up to date with current trends, strength programs, mobility expansion and movement capacity. Research doesn’t stand still. The human body doesn’t stay fixed. For my clients, they can run the spectrum in ability and I need to figure out what modality/approach best suits their needs to get the maximum response out of their body’s and minds. Selfishly, I want to keep myself in top condition and the more tools I have in my toolbox, the more systems I can explore to see what works. Thinking that the same things that worked for me 25 years ago will work for me today is a fixed and foolish mindset. I have to be able to realize that although some systems and approaches could still be successful, some do not work as well anymore. Embracing new empirical research and more up-to-date studies can have profound effects on enhancing movement capabilities and improving strength output. It certainly has for me.
One of the key components in the fitness industry is learning what works best for each coach. No other coach can adequately convey to a coach what he/she “should” do and what’s appropriate for their respective clients. The more education a coach attains, the more he/she can choose which approach will best serve their clients needs. A one-size-fits-all approach limits how well a client can move and generate power and thus limit their talents outside the gym. I have taken many courses and spent weekends learning a method that I’ve rarely used. That being said, I have never felt it was a waste of time or money: I’ve learned an idea that I initially dismissed may help me understand something bigger in the future. Regardless of the eventual outcome, going into a learning experience arms me with the mindset that I do not know everything and it expands my thought process. It humbles me each time. And that is the process vital to developing my craft.
The hardest part to approaching a growth mindset is knowing how to balance what currently works and what can be slowly implemented or adopted. It doesn’t need to be a continental shift in thinking and coaching—the best coaches learn how to incorporate new and effective techniques into an already cohesive program. It takes time and patience. It can be incredibly deflating. But it’s worth it.
Ultimately it’s learning how to blend older, fundamental principles with progressive concepts. That powerful blend will provoke further questions and deeper understandings in keeping with how our bodies and minds—and that of clients—constantly adapt to change. Growth mindset doesn’t have a limit. It will equip a coach with the best mental temperament to deliver results for their clients while also providing self empowerment in tackling what seems to be the impossible.
And it’s absolute gold when handling 3 growing little girls at home.
